The Breastfeeding Chronicles, Part XVIIIV$#@%^%$

Okay, so breastfeeding is no longer going as poorly as my title would suggest. I’m actually pretty amazed at how far we’ve come in the last month and was happy to discover that those people who swore it would get easier, were right.

I’m also happy to report the rape of the nipple is no longer happening. I do still have a little pain from time to time, but the difference between then and now is astonishing. When last I spoke about breastfeeding, I was dealing with a massive overflow issue that resulted in me water-boarding my daughter on a regular basis.

About two weeks ago, Alice started to refuse my right breast because I think she was a little tired of feeling like she was drowning in a sea of milk. And I guess who could blame her. I will admit, I had a bit of a breakdown that morning out of sheer frustration with the whole breastfeeding thing.

I’ve been going every Wednesday morning to a group called Breastfeeding Buddies, run by the local health authority here and they gave me some good advice on skin-to-skin contact to try and get her to start feeding on the right side again. So I went home and stripped us both down and got into bed and put Alice on top of me. And wouldn’t you know it? Slowly, slowly she made her way across my chest, towards my right breast and just latched right on, perfect as can be. It was pretty amazing to watch actually. Mother Nature does know her shit sometimes.

That night I also decided to go to a La Leche meeting since  I felt like I needed all the help I could get. Except that was a total bust because some dumb moron ended up monopolizing the entire two hours of the meeting with her pointless whiny drivel, so that by 9pm, Alice and I were both exhausted, crying and ready to go home. I got back to our house and I started swearing a blue streak in frustration. It had just been a long day.

Eventually I managed to calm down. (Only a few things were broken.)

Since then, we’ve continued with what I like to call the “face plant feed”, letting gravity work with us instead of against us. My supply seems to be adjusting a little, but the girls are still pretty ripe most of the time. I’m hoping things will still improve a little more.

Anyways, I guess the point of this post is to say that breastfeeding is hard. But we’ve come so far and the very best advice I got at the beginning was not to give up–it will get easier. I’m now at the point where I don’t even have to get out of bed at night, I just plop Alice on top of me, let her feed and then put her back in her bassinet. It’s made those late-night feedings so much more enjoyable. During the day, feeding no longer feels like the endless chore it once did. Feedings are now very quick–only about five minutes–and starting to spread apart so it’s not quite so constant. I’ve also gotten pretty comfortable with feeding her in public, so I don’t feel totally housebound anymore.

It’s been amazing. I’ve been waiting for that connection, that bond that they say is created through breastfeeding and I think we’re finally there.

 

PS–Thank you to everyone who signed up for the PAIL blogroll yesterday. What a great response already! Just a reminder to add the button to your sidebars if you haven’t done so already and if you could give a shout out to the project in a future blogpost, so we can connect to as many people as possible, that would be fantastic. I have emailed everyone the code and instructions. For those who aren’t ready to join but would like to add the button anyways, click here for the code and instructions.